What makes families successful

Sometimes, love is spelled t-i-m-e. Strong families manage stress and crisis effectively. They are not immune or exempt from difficult days and challenging situations, but they develop strategies so they can pull together, rather than fall apart. Strong families have a sense of spiritual well-being. Whatever the expression of their spiritual lifestyle, there are consistent themes of guiding values and ethics, as well as a commitment to important causes. Strong families have effective and positive communication patterns.

They talk to each other and listen to each other and may have specific ground rules on how they communicate in respectful, loving ways. This helps scaffold personal independence. Consequences for less desirable behaviour are usually natural ones. Go to Why Use Natural Consequences? The most effective way of implementing supportive organization into your family is to:.

Work out one area you would like to improve upon. For example:. Start small and build upon your incremental successes rather than start too big and fail.

Enlist family input to discuss how this could best be done, discuss the need for support, individual's responsibilities and rewards linked to implementing this new organization. We all prefer to do what feels good, Can you make this new habit attractive or fun? If not can you link it to something that is fun e.

Keep a record of your small improvements. It builds commitment and confidence. And acknowledging the positive in others helps build good relationships.

Increasingly link newer habits to existing habits over time: e. You'd like the house to be cleaner. New habit: Shoes go off at the door. As each new habit is successfully incorporated into routines, over weeks, link in a small new one. Success breeds success. Building incrementally is easier at the beginning. And because of each success builds upon past successes, you compound on your success over time. Below is my practical ideas bank that you can use as is, or as a springboard to help you automate your life.

You'll notice I've made sticking to my values as easy as possible:. Put a routine chart on the fridge so kids know what they need to do in the morning: Independence.

Make chores into fun games. Use egg timers for turn taking. You can buy sets in three, five, ten minute internals. Great for avoiding arguments: Positive family relationships. Acknowledge improvement: Encouraging Independence. Have at least half a day a week when you do something fun together as a family. That's family time. Add an opportunity for learning about mathematics incidentally e.

Healthy Lifestyle. Put exercise clothes out ready for morning exercise: Health is important. Exercise first thing, that way despite how busy you are, every day has something in it for you: Health is important, Life is enjoyable. Make up 2 or 3 salads at a time for lunches. That way if you need a snack, you have a salad ready: Health is important, Saving money on takeaway. If you want to watch the t.

Floss your teeth immediately after your evening meal that way you don't eat after dinner. Health is important. Do pelvic floor exercises while you clean your teeth, have a shower, stop at traffic lights: Health is important. Have a bedtime routine: Healthy sleep habits for everyone: Sleep is important for health, health is important. Have cut up fruit in fridge for snacks: Health is important. Home Organisation. If kid's sport is cancelled have a cooking day. Make heaps of meals and freeze them: curries, spaghetti, Mex, etc.

Learn more: Timesavers for Healthy Meals Organization supports healthy eating, saves money. Make up a permanent shopping list of everything you buy. Fluoro the items linked to your menu: Organization supports healthy eating, saves money. Establish a fortnightly repeating menu based on your time schedule. On days you arrive home late use a pre-made frozen meal: Organization supports healthy eating, saves money.

Put frozen pre-made meals into the fridge to thaw before you leave for work, then you only need to cook rice or pasta. Organization supports healthy eating. Pack schoolbags the night before, ready for lunches to be added the next morning: Organization supports healthy eating, saves money on takeaway. Your habits will determine your future. Child Education. Establish reading a book a day from when children are very young at bedtime: Education is important.

Practise phonics for two minutes every school day with 5 and 6 year-old developing readers. Check out the Fun Phonics Game to make it easier. It's free. Help your child learn the Most Used Words. Education is important. When children are in infants school have them read to you for ten minutes every school day. It's one of the greatest things you can do for them.

Set up an afternoon routine: snack, homework, relaxation time after homework: Independence is built upon over time. If you're buying your child a gift, buy a book on a subject your child is passionate about. Adding even one tiny positive habit can make a massive difference to your child's success. Because 'positive effects accumulate over time. They'll learn reading and writing conventions which will help later with their own reading and writing.

Did you know? That by spending just five minutes a day, reading one book to your child, from 6 months to 6 years your child will have been exposed to around a million more words than if you didn't. There is an amazing article called 'The Early Catastrophe: The 30 Million Word Gap' which compares the amount and quality of language used within households and the cumulative impact upon children. Because words in stories are in context, your child will increase their vocabulary, improve their comprehension, their grammar, plus their ability to predict text because they already know what makes sense.

The best thing you can spend on your kids, is time. You may be looking for a few ideas on how to tweak what's already working. Adding 'little' habits to what you're already doing well, usually increases your success over time. If you immediately acknowledge when you stick to your goals, it helps increase your success Because living an authentic life feels great. When our actions reinforce who we believe our best selves to be, we usually feel fantastic.

And if you take the extra step of recording when you stick to your goals, you'll realize just how great a parent you really are A new positive parenting habit can be something simple like:. Scheduling allows families to carve out time together, which strengthens connections and builds memories. Family rituals that work should not be too rigid or stressful, so establish ones that are easily incorporated into daily life. Read stories to younger kids or a chapter from a novel to older ones , set up a family game night every Friday, call grandparents every Sunday, or return to a favorite restaurant for every birthday celebration.

One of the most beneficial rituals cited by the experts is family dinner. Eating together creates strong bonds and great memories while also creating a forum for family members to communicate with each other.

Historically, the most reliable place and time for American families to come together has been around the dinner table. However, modern realities make this challenging for many. Not sure how to start that conversation? According to Fishel and research by psychologist Marshall Duke at Emory University, kids who know family stories grow up feeling more resilient and have more self-esteem.

By learning the story of their family, kids develop a feeling of shared identity. When you include them in the story, you honor their future path. Just be sure to emphasize the moral of the story, rather than yourself as a role model in it. Open communication is so beneficial to families that Fishel made it a cornerstone of The Family Dinner Project.

Talking to young kids helps them develop language skills that are important for discussing their feelings, celebrating accomplishments, and bolstering their sense of self. As kids grow older, communication is central to developing conflict resolution skills and building empathy. By communicating openly, families demonstrate mutual respect for each other. This way, when they need to express frustrations or have challenging conversations with each other, they all feel secure and supported.

Give them ways to talk about how they feel. Have them tell you a story from their day or their imagination.